


Talk It Out

by liquid_dreams



Category: Grand Theft Auto V
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2016-05-09
Packaged: 2018-06-07 09:55:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6799189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liquid_dreams/pseuds/liquid_dreams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Amanda needs someone to vent to, preferably not someone who talks about anuses all day. The doctor may be odd, but she has some good ideas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Talk It Out

Fabien's flat was large and comfortable, but much smaller than the mansion in Rockford Hills Amanda had gotten used to. She supposed it was better than staying at a hotel. Cheaper, too. She was by no means poor, but it couldn't hurt to hold onto her money. She was still so unsure about her situation with Michael. At first she'd always kept an ear open, sure that he'd come charging in guns blazing. After a month of radio silence she started sleeping easier. Tracy seemed more relaxed as well. She spent every other night at her latest boyfriend's house. For once she got to enjoy a man's attention without having to worry about him being chased away. It did wonders for her. She laughed more and there was a new spark in her daughter's eyes. Amanda herself did more yoga than ever and her chakras were completely unblocked. Through hours of peaceful workouts the permanent tension in her shoulders eased. Fabien's competent hands helped, too. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so at ease in her own skin. The realization was sobering.  
At Fabien's advice she looked for a therapist to talk to. Some of the things on her mind she didn't feel comfortable with sharing with him. So it happened that she booked an appoinment with Dr. Kate Philips at her office on Vespucci Beach. The doctor's office was in a nice modern flat close to the water. Amanda waited patiently in the reception room, reading an interior decorating mag and listening to the faint murmuring of voices on the other side of the door. After a quarter hour a middle age woman emerged sobbing into a tissue. Amanda watched her go before she turned her gaze on the tall woman standing in the office door. She wore a casual yet elegant grey suit which clashed with her short turquoise hair. The doctor smiled faintly.

"You must be Mrs. De Santa," her voice was pleasant and calm. 

"Yes." Amada felt herself relax and shook her hand with a smile. "I do hope I won't end up crying today."

"Emotional release can be very cathartic," the doctor chuckled. She had warm brown eyes and up close Amanda could make out the dark roots of her hair staring to show. 

"Please, come in. You scheduled today's appointment to last for half an hour."

"Yeah. I just needed somebody to talk to who won't judge me for once." Amada sat down on a comfortable leather chair and folded her hands together. 

"I take it your social environment is.."

"Well," Amanda began uncomfortably. "I live with a good friend right now. My daughter isn't home very often anymore since we moved out of my husband's house. My son has his own flat."

The doctor nodded encouragingly. Amanda swallowed. "It's all my husband's fault."

"He is the reason you moved out of your home?"

"Yes." 

"Tell me about him."

"His name is Michael. He used to be a... Well, a criminal. Small time robberies and the like. We met at the strip club where I worked. You see he's a charmer and a sweet-talker. Before I knew it I'd fallen for him. He was the epitome of the tall dark and handsome bad guy who swept me off my feet. Money was short, but it didn't matter. Then we had the kids and things were getting tougher. I can't go into detail, but nine years ago he made a deal that was supposed to be the end of his criminal career and secure our future."

"Go on."

"It's just. We came to Los Santos and our marriage just started falling apart. It all began when he cheated on me with a stripper, of all things."

"How did you react?"

"I was prepared to be faithful to him, but when I found him with her... I cheated right back."

The doctor nodded gravely and wrote something down on her notepad. "This cheating has been going on ever since?"

"Yes."

"Have you considered getting divorced before?"

"All the time, but I just can't."

"What about your husband?"

"He'd never divorce me," Amanda scoffed. "He's got all these abandonment issues from his dad. No, if we get a divorce I have to take the first step."

"Do you think he is a threat to you or your children?" Dr. Philips asked in a serious tone. 

"Yes," Amanda replied automatically, but quickly reconsidered. "No. Not intentionally, I think."

At the alarmed look on the doctor's face she quickly rushed to add. "He's not threatened us! It's just that recently he's been going out more and I'm afraid he's doing jobs again. His temper has been unpredictable but he won't talk to me of course."

"You don't want to get the police involved?" Dr. Philips asked gently. 

Amanda laughed. "God no."

"Alright, but if you feel unsafe you need to contact help," Dr. Philips said with a stern look. "What caused the recent change in your husband's behaviour?" 

"Trevor." Amanda spat the name like it was poison.

"Who's Trevor?" The doctor cocked her head to the side.

"He used to be my husband's running buddy and best friend. We thought he'd died nine years ago, but last week he showed up on our doorstep." Amanda balled her hands into fists and glared at the abstract painting on the wall. "Whenever he showed up he'd drag Michael into some harebrained scheme that nearly got them both killed. And Michael let him, again and again. It didn't matter that he had a family; whenever Trevor called he dropped everything and went. Nothing's changed. Michael hasn't fucking changed one bit."

"It's alright, let it all out."

 

"Michael is a selfish prick! He spent the past nine years drinking and staring miserably into space, letting me raise the kids practically by myself. He didn't give a shit about us, because he's so caught up in his own head. Now he suddenly wants us back."

"What about you, Mrs. De Santa?"

"Amanda, please." Amanda sighed wearily. "I guess I still love him deep down. But I'm so tired of all this bullshit. I'm tired of being lied to, to have the promises made to me broken."

"Your feelings a valid, Amanda. You deserve honesty." Dr. Philips was scribbling furiously. 

"Yeah," Amanda rubbed at her temples. "We're so fucked up, me and him. I tried to raise my kids to be better people than us, but I guess I didn't do so great."

"What about your kids? What do they think of the situation?"

"Well, Tracey's mostly glad she gets to have a boyfriend for once. She's a lot like me when I was younger. Only more spoiled and bratty." She tried hard to keep calm. "Jimmy spends most of his time playing games and smoking weed. At least I guess he still does. He moved out when Michael started going crazy."

"You love your kids?"

"Of course! Well, most of the time. Do you have kids?"

"No," Dr. Philips shuddered.

"Let me give you some advice: Don't. Ever." Amanda tried to laugh, but it sounded brittle even to her own ears. 

"Let's circle back to your husband. He still loves you?"

"At least he says that he does. But everything he's done recently points to the opposite." 

"The cheating, you mean?"

"I mean him running with Trevor fucking Philips!"

Dr. Philips' eyes flashed with something like triumph. "You don't seem to like this Trevor very much."

"I hate him. The feeling's mutual." Amanda stated darkly. 

"Why do you think he hates you?"

Amanda let out a humorless laugh. "Because Michael chose me over him."

The doctor leaned back in her chair with an intrigued look. "You believe he's jealous of you?"

Amanda sighed and crossed her legs. "Yeah. Has always been. You know, when I first met them I thought they were together."

"How so?"

"It was just their closeness, the way they kept touching each other all the time. I'd never seen something like that between people who weren't in love. Michael reassured me they were just really close friends, brothers even, but to be honest I think there was more on Trevor's side. Oh doc you'd have a field day picking through his deranged brain. He's a complete psycho, a danger to himself and others." 

"And when you married Michael?"

"Trevor wasn't there. I could tell it bothered Michael a lot," Amanda recalled bitterly. "He'd wanted him to be his best man. We didn't see him for a month afterwards."

"Did you ever talk with your husband about his feelings for Trevor?" When Amanda shrugged and shook her head Dr. Philips went on. "From what you told me so far I believe Michael might have suppressed a part of his sexuality."

"You think Michael's gay?" Amanda gaped.

"No, no. I think he might be a deeply repressed bisexual." Dr. Philips chuckled lightly, "Without talking to him I can only guess however."

"Yeah good luck with that. He hates talking about his feelings other than to complain about the misery of being rich and retired early." Amanda stared curiously at the doctor while she wrote. "What makes you think he had a thing for Trevor? I've never seen him make so much as eyes at another guy."

"Bisexual people can be attracted 99% to one gender," Dr. Philips said absently. "And when they meet the 1% of the other, they can very much fall in love with that." 

"You think Trevor's the 1%?" 

"He might be. After all you've told me about their relationship I can only conclude that Michael feels very deeply about him, to the point where he is willing to leave his family behind. He probably doesn't recognize his feelings for what they are, though." The doctor muttered the last part to herself, looking lost in thought. 

Amanda sat back and took that in. It made some kind of weird sense. Whenever the two of them were together Michael got this look in his eyes, like he wasn't sure whether to strangle or hug Trevor. It was the kind of fire she remembered from the early days of their relationship. It didn't help her at all, though.  
Amanda looked around the office with a slight frown. Now that she paid attention to it the furniture was mostly dark leather and wood with not a single feminine touch. It was quite an odd bureau for a female doctor, but.. maybe that was just a question of taste. She peered at the other woman's notebook. There were a bunch of thought bubbles connected to each other, with words that were barely legible. In the middle the doctor had drawn an eye. The way Dr. Philips' fingers kept twitching reminded her of spider legs. Slowly, an uneasy feeling started to spread in Amanda's guts. She glanced discreetly at her watch to discover that 56 minutes had passed already. She shifted in her seat and cleared her throat, suddenly eager to get out of there.

"Um, I think our time's up?" She smiled tightly. 

"What? Oh yes, of course." Dr. Philips waved dismissively at her, staring at her notes. 

Amanda stood up slowly and walked towards the door with her heart beating in her throat. The sound of a book snapping shut behind her made her jump a little.

"Say Amanda, you don't know where Trevor lives do you?"

"I ah..," she thought furiously, frozen two steps away from the door. 

"It would be very helpful." 

Dr. Philips voice was directly behind her, but it had lost all traces of emotion. A cold sweat spread out all over her body as she racked her brain. 

"Oh! Michael mentioned that he's staying with him when he last called Jimmy. T-they're out in Sandy Shores."

"Thank you."

Amanda pushed the door open with more force than neccessary and nearly sprinted out of the building. When the sun hit her face and the familiar sounds of traffic flooded her ears she sucked in a breath and walked straight to her car. Something about that doctor was very off and Fabien always said she should trust her gut. There wouldn't be a next appointment, that much she was sure of.


End file.
